Moving Beyond Perfection

Don’t let small things get you down

Posted in Uncategorized by Kathy on July 5, 2009

Do you ever find yourself thinking way too much about something small someone else said to you? They might have just said something quick in passing, or they might have just been joking around, but then you go home just wondering what it is that they meant, why they said what they said, and what implications they were making about you.

I realize now how often I have let so many small things other people have said about  me impact my feelings and actions. I guess I am just a sensitive person, but small things can make or break my day. Just as a smile from a stranger jogging past me while I am on a run can instantly brighten my mood, a small negative statement said about me can break my day.

As an example,I distinctly remember how an ex boyfriend of mine repeatedly made references about how hott and amazing another girl at our school was with his guy friends when she would walk by. Thinking back on it, this was just guy talk, and it was more of a joke than anything (kind of like a celebrity sighting to him),  but I remember being greatly upset by it. Although his compliments to her did not imply that I was bad-looking, this was the implication I was left with. I mean, after all, if I was good looking enough, then why would he feel the need to mention her? It has been small comments like these that have contributed to my self-esteeme issues entering college.

But why do we let things other people say affect us so much? In the end, we should only need to please ourselves. If we base our judgment of ourselves on what other people think, then how can we ever be truly happy with ourselves? I think the reason we do this though is because we can never see ourselves. We can see everyone around us and judge the entire world as we like, but we can never actually look at ourselves. Even mirrors can be deceitful, and your reflection in every mirror will change. As a result, it seems as though we rely on other people’s judgements to evaluate our own selves. I’ve come to realize that I really just need to start focusing on how I feel about myself rather than what other people think. I just need to be me.

***

I am going to start leaving random little tips that I’ve picked up while living alone in NYC, with limited belongings and a tight budget. So here is today’s tip of the day:

If you are subletting an apartment and have few cooking appliances such as a toaster, you can make toast by placing slices of bread directly on a pan on the stove. You’ll have to watch the bread closely to make sure it doesn’t burn, but heating the bread on a pan will toast it nicely. It will make your sandwich ten times more tasty :)

***

Some blissful, but wholesome living:

DSC01287Vegan Chocolate Walnut Chewie by Lifethyme Natural Supermarket in West Village, NYC

Ingredients: Organic oats, organic dates, cacao nibs, pecans, almonds, Organic Coconut, vanilla extract, cinnamon, sea salt.

With a smear of peanut butter, this made a delicious dessert! I had a fourth of the large donut-like cake.

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